Scientology Personality

10.01.2004

I have been intrigued about Scientology for years, yet never done anything about it, for better or worse. I mean, I like L. Ron Hubbards books, but I don't know how well he would serve as a religious leader.

While trying to learn a little, I found the Church of Scientology Personality Test. I guess it's supposed to help you learn how Scientology can help you help yourself. Helpfully. It's a 200 question test that you can get to by filling in about 3 pages of personal information. If you're like me, it's the personal information of a fictional version of yourself, because there's some things you just don't want everyone to know. After taking the quiz, I was given the following graph:

You're supposed to go to the nearest Church of Scientology to go over the test results in detail (the church has been mailed a copy of the details, not available online). From what I can see on the graph, I learned the following about myself:

• I'm unacceptably depressed. This is news to me, as I thought I was a pretty happy person.
• I'm very nervous. Especially after finding out that I'm depressed.
• I have a desirable state of certainty. This means I'm certain that I'm nervous about my newly found depression.
• I have a lack of accord. I have the most extreme lack of accord possible. Any more (or less?) and I would fall of the chart. I think this rocks! And obviously, I don't care what you think.
• I'm also withdrawn, with I can certainly attribute to my lack of accord.

I think this means I would make a lousy Scientologist. Or maybe they have a detailed methodology to turn my life around. Unfortunately, as my graph points out, I don't care (I can now blame everything on my proven lack of accord!)

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Super Fun Link Day

09.30.2004

This is one of those days when some of the links off Fark just caught my eye:

• The Dilbert Ultimate House. There's a wall full of Dilbert-A-Day calendar pages up in the office, so a house of of Dilbert has to intrigue me.
• Laser injures Delta pilot's eye while he was landing. Who can point a laser inside a cockpit of a landing plane?
• Reasons Why You Just Saw Porn on My Computer Screen. Well, that's just a handy list to have.
• Topless Girls Ride Mechanical Bulls For New DVD. Proof that men really will buy anything. I, of course, have known this since the days of Atari and the release of Custers Revenge, the start of badly pixelated porn as I knew (or at least heard) of.

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Brittle Mom

09.29.2004

I'm not sure how she managed it, but Mom now has a broken foot.

I know, the first image that pops into mind is her kicking Terry around to keep him in line. Maybe even her fighting off a ninja horde. But no. How did she break her foot?

She stepped on a rock.

Not "stepped on a rock, slipped, and broke her foot", just "stepped on a rock". From the way she explained it, she stepped on a rock and afterward thought she had a bruise from stepping on it too hard. 3 weeks later, she still has a little bruise that's calloused. She goes to the foot doctor (they don't have podiatrists near Tater Peeler Rd.) to see about getting her callouses taken care of, only to find out an x-ray later that she has many hairline fractures in her foot.

From stepping on a rock.

Mom is now encased in Carbonite and awaits her recovery. Actually, she's got one of those boots that lets her walk around while keeping pressure off her foot for the next 3 weeks.

The moral of the story? Don't go stepping on any rocks!

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So Not Ready To Rumble

09.27.2004

Over the weekend I goofed off more than I should have (my garage cleaning chore is only about halfway finished). Part of my goofing was spent playing some games, one of which was Def Jam: Fight for NY. Much like the precursor to this game, I suck at it. My butt got kicked all over the place.

Although I seem to suck at it, I did like this game a little better than the first. This one lets you create your fighter, although not as detailed as the Smackdown series Create-A-Wrestler. You also pick yopur style of fighting, and then spend points later learning new moves, or even a new style. But I still get KO'ed in the first couple of fights. Every time. Now I know why I tend to stick with driving games.

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Sunday Sunday Sundaaaayyyyy

09.24.2004

Being in that I've been in a video game mood lately, I picked up a requisite driving game. Hey, I've been playing football just to mix things up, but I can't give up wrestling and driving cold turkey! But maybe I should have tried the cold turkey thing.

Test Drive: Eve of Destruction is the latest addition to the Test Drive franchise, which has never been quite up to the par set by the Need For Speed series. The latest incarnation has you taking the role of Billy Bob Joe Bumpkis (or something similar) out in the sticks as you try to make your way to fame and fortune racing in demolition derby type races. Although it sounds to me like a good concept - who doesn't like wrecking cars - the game just doesn't pull it off well. Maybe I just haven't progressed far enough to get the cool cars, but so far I slide around in underpowered Pacers and bump into other cars. Sometimes I get points for hitting the other cars, sometimes I don't.

I think I should have gotten Jerry's surprise find for himself, Burnout 3, the first driving game without guns that Jerry seems to actually like!

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