Russellmania.com 2015 ¼-Marathon!
August 22, 2015 saw me as the winner of the 2015 Russellmania.com ¼-Marathon! I managed first place in this special event held near Athens High School. The route started at my car, which I found very convenient, and passed through scenic Athens, but away from traffic. Finally, after a grueling 6.55 miles that saw temperatures vary wildly from 68° to upwards of 71°, I managed to triumphantly pass the finish line FIRST after just over 2 hours. A finish line that was, again conveniently, at my car.
I was worried I might be beat out by the Kenyans, or even worse, that group of women pushing baby strollers, but I need not have fretted. I was first. FIRST! I wonder if they knew there was a race going on...?
The race wasn't without dangers. There evidently was a bicycle race going the opposite direction, as a dude on a bike passed me a couple of time. And he was flying. Although since we were going opposite directions you may need to take into account that I was viewing our relative speed, so maybe I was flying! Still, we need to talk to race organizers about concurrent races sharing the same route.
I would like to thank everyone for their support, without which I couldn't have realized this accomplishment.
First, I'd like to thank the little infant baby Jesus, laying there in his little heavenly bassinet and most likely with his little baby Jesus thumb in his mouth. I know it's not Thanksgiving but shout out to you there Lil' J.
Thanks to the Kenyans for not beating me.
Thanks to the race organizers for placing the start & finish lines at my car.
Now I've just gotten the official race results. I finished 1/1 overall. 1st in the Men's Division. Also managed 1st in Women's, Handicapable, and Breathing Heavy Divisions. Huh, it seems since it was a field of 1 I technically also came in last place. Well that sucks! I'll over look that part. Ooh, I won't even post that part. I'll hit delete and nobody will ever know!
Crap. Hit "Post" instead of "Delete" so now it's too late.